Will: to impart or execute….relative or relatives…..right or wrong….dance or not
Monthly Archives: March 2013
I am standing in front of the bathroom mirror unable to focus my eyes when I start to think about what I drank last night. I run through my alcohol inventory and come up with only a couple glasses of wine, “what is wrong with me,” I think to myself. I feel like I am terribly hung over.
I take my glasses off and rub my eyes for a minute and then put my glasses back on. I look back at the mirror and I am immediately dizzy and my eyesight blurry. What the hell is wrong? I take my glasses off and put them on the vanity next to the sink. I then reach over and turn on the cold water and forming a cup with my hands I fill it with cold water and proceed to stick my face into the puddle of cold water I am holding in my hands.
I rinse my face for a good 30 seconds and then grab a towel and dry off.
I look back into the mirror and like magic my vision is perfect and I am not dizzy. “Weird,” I think.
Being good to go I grab my glasses and put them back on, take one more look in the mirror and once again my vision is blurry and I get dizzy. “What the hell,” I scream inside my head.
It’s at this point I experience that Sherlock Holmesian feeling that there must be something wrong with my glasses. Sure nuff, as I am looking at my glasses as I hold them in my right hand I take my left index finger and push it through the opening where the left lens should be. Yup, the lens had fallen out of my glasses, that is why my vision was blurry and I got dizzy….ugh I am a moron.
The other snow day I am working from home. I have my iPad thingee going and my work laptop. At some point I forget which is which and start touching the screen of my laptop thinking it would do something. Well, as I sat there and touched the screen on my laptop and nothing happened I got pissed and started looking at the control buttons trying to figure out why the screen wasn’t responding to my touch. This went on, seriously, for about 15 minutes until, in a moment of brilliance I remembered that my laptop wasn’t a touch screen device. I am a moron.
I don’t mean to be a moron, it just happens some times. It’s not a bad thing it’s just a thing.
A couple observations on this thing we call life. First, it’s fleeting so make sure you enjoy every moment. Second, it’s fleeting so make sure you enjoy every moment and third, it’s fleeting so enjoy every moment.
Can’t we all just be silly for a day?
I mean really silly. I mean Monty Python silly walk, penguin on the TV silly. Wave my private parts at your auntie silly.
You know what saying I am sick of? You’ve heard the saying, “it’s not about the destination it’s about the journey.” We’ll I was hiking the other day, a particularly tougher hike for my fat ass, and I thought to myself…..”self, fuck this shit, let’s just get to the destination and save myself all this time and energy.”
Sometimes lets just get to the fucking destination and take it from there. I mean, shit, if we get to the destination early maybe there’s something cool to do there…rather than wasting all that time on the journey, we could skip the journey, get to the destination and see if there’s shit to do to that’s worthwhile. All you journey lovers, and you know who you are, maybe it’s better to just go straight to the destination. Yes, pass go, don’t collect any money and go straight to destination land and then regroup and go from there. I think it’s a plan.
So next time someone says it’s not about the destination it’s about the journey tell them to fuck off and that you’ll meet them in destination land where you will be waiting for them.
Speaking of destinations…..set the controls for the center of the sun….let the games begin…