I thought I’d try something new. Let’s see how far I can type with a headful of the best IPA (green flash and Smuttynose) along with an open window and a cold spring rain falling.
Currently, as opposed to noncurrently, the support system for my head is in serious jeopardy. What the hell does that mean. Put it this way, I am currently battling a good case of head dropsies. You know that moment when the muscles, tendons and bones can’t possibly support the weight of your cranium and it bounces embarassingly forward like you’re about to fall asleep.
Monkeys fly at dawn, the little fuckers.
Me, I ain’t flying no where. I am grounded on the couch next to the open window. Goddamn monkeys.
Whoa, who let the dogs out. Who? Who? Who?
OK, I was thinking about that dude in Iran – Ramalamadingdong or is it Ahmadinejad….what ever. Once Syria comes to their senses and figures out that chililng with the Obama dude ain’t a bad thing President Ramalingajad will come around cuz in my opinion you don’t want to be hanging in the mideast with no peeps to chill with yo. Nope.
I love ending sentences with yo. Makes me feel like I am in the hood
Do you think there’s a place for like a 5o something hood. We’d all be chill, takin our flowmax and the current version of a qualude – viagra. Sorry my flomax ain’t working, I gotta go pee again.
Whoa, I digress…..shit, my head just fell off my neck…….slksdlkadkfla;dk
I think it’s back on.
Seriously though, what the heck is up with Cuba? If I am Raul I’d say….yo obama dude, let’s put the commie shit aside and open up our borders and check out our beaches. Damn, never mind that fact that we got some cigars that will kick your capitalistic cigar ass. Most importantly with Cuba back in play they we can deliver that Florida state that has bedeviled the democrats for years.
Keep Cuba around and there is no chance Jeb will arise from the political dead……ever……then again ever may not be long enough.
Speaking of Jeb, what ever happened to Dubbya Junior. I think the last time I heard from him he was swimming in a pool of rainbow colored balls at a Dallas Chucky Cheese.
Whoops, my head almost got detachedddd…. I think I gave myself whiplash.
What is up with the emails that tell me they can make my penis harder, longer and more potent. I am wondering do females get emails about making their vagina do something magical? Seriously, what’s the deal?
At this point, if I answered every email about making my penis longer it would stretch around the globe, contain enough semen to populate five planets and would be strong enough to support the Obama high speed train initiative. All that said, if my erection lasted more than 4 hours I would have to call some hotline. An erection more than 4 hours…..ha, I’d call Guinness book of records or maybe build that addition.
Oops, I just knodded off for about a half hour. I love a cold rain in the spring. The sound is hypnotic.
Huh, sorry, I got hypnotized by the rain, for the last 30 minute I’ve been, yep I’ve been.
Sorry, just woke up again. Hehehehehehehehehe….piss off
I remember when twitter meant someone twisting your nipple until it hurt…..don’t ask……
thhhhhhhhhppppppptttttttt is the sound someone makes when they stick their tongue out at you and force air around it …. I learned that from Berkeley Breathed the dude that created Bloom County. Nuff said.
With that I leave you with one word – Llama. I love llama’s. God bless the llama, especially the rare Costa Rican River Llama. Llamaramalamadingdong.