Open Simsim – Bob

Uh, oh.

I really screwed up.  I totally misread this whole lent thing. 

Lent represents the 40 days baby jeebus spent in the desert being tempted by one of them evil doers.  Hmmm, funny how 40 is such a popular number in the bible….ark fans remember that it rained for 40 days and 40 nights.  I think Moses was on Mt Sinai for 40 days, heck I think the Hebrews spent 40 days wandering the desert and don’t forget about Ali Baba and the 40 thieves.  Wait, I think that was a different book…still was a pretty good story….

 Quick- for a free pizza – first correct answer – What is the popular phrase that was originally – open simsim?

I better play 40 in the lottery.

So, this Lent thing supposedly represents a period of fasting and abstinence.

Here’s where I screwed up – I read it as fasting and absinthe. 

So for the past couple weeks all I’ve been doing is eating crackers and drinking this highly alcoholic wormwood distillation.

No wonder I can’t remember who I loaned Bob too?  Who’s Bob?  He’s my miniature, talking elephant.  Oh, by the way, he can also make himself invisible.

Bob has a bad attitude though.  Sort of a pachyderm Napoleonic complex thing.

When he’s not pissed off at the world he’s pretty funny.  We like to go to the grocery store and raise havoc.  He turns invisible and waits for some lady pushing one of those giant plastic car carts with the kids in them to go by and he knocks shit off the shelf.  The mom yells at the kids because she thinks they did it.  Little does she know it’s my friend the invisible, miniature, talking elephant.  Hehehehehehe

Hold on, someones banging on the door.

Cool, Bob just got back.  I think he’s drunk or very stoned.  He keeps muttering something about partying with Obama mama in the Bahamas. 

Gotta go, he’s definitely shit faced and I gotta see if I can sober him up….Cheers  anyone got any peanuts? 

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