“The first thing any comedian does on getting an unscheduled laugh is to verify the state of his buttons.” A great quote from the late William Claude Dukenfield (aka WC Fields).
Buttons are everywhere. You could say I am typing this on buttons. Most of us call them keys. Use your cell phone today, you used buttons, used your radio in the car – I bet you used buttons. Put on a shirt or pants – bet you encountered buttons in the process. How about the remote for your tv? Yep more buttons….turn on your computer…..more buttons….say something you knew would trigger a specific response in a person – more buttons.
I wrote, “Say something you knew would trigger a specific response in a person – more buttons.”
Ah, those buttons, we all have them and we all know how to use other’s buttons too.
There are books written on how to manipulate other peoples buttons for profit – take a gander at most sales training manuals….heck I even found a book on line about how to use psychological buttons to seduce women.
I bought 5 copies.
Shit there are even blogs written about it……hehehehehe
Buttons are the easiest way to win a discussion or worse elicit predictive behavior in an individual for purpose of manipulating that person.
I’ve written this before folks, but it bears repeating now…..
STOP BEING PREDICTABLE. If you are predictable, people will continue to push those buttons that they use to manipulate your actions and to drive predictable emotions…good or bad.
Predictable is boring. It’s like living in Florida (no offense EF but you never struck me as a Florida chick)….the weather is beautifully boring….snore……
I love New England weather. I love the crappy, nasty, stay in bed till 3pm because it sucks out days. I love the ice storms. I love the bugs, humidity and 110 degree days. Why?
Because it’s unpredictable and it makes me appreciate the 10 or so magnificent days where there is nary a cloud in the sky and the thermometer never gets above 75 or below 60.
Folks, DON’T BE PREDICTABLE.
That said, I love the fact that there are predictable people in life. It makes things easier.
All this said, not allowing someone to push your buttons is not easy. As a matter of fact it can be downright unhealthy until you find an outlet to channel those button pushing emotions. For me it’s exercise or any physical activity. Also I have found that meditation is good. In the beginning it was easier for me to go for a long walk than to sit and get my mind single focused on simply my breathing. Calming an agitated mind like reigning in a raging brook is not an easy task.
So where do you start.
You start within. You and you alone have the ability to manage your response to “button pushing.” To begin you must identify what those buttons are and what triggers your response.
Get a piece of paper and write down the last time you recall someone pushing your buttons.
What was the button?
What was the response?
What was the outcome? Was it positive? Was it negative?
Write it all down and read it again.
If the outcome was negative think about how you could have handled the situation different. No,no, no – thinking of grabbing an UZI is not an option, unless of course you are a complete coward.
Think about how you could have turned that negative into a positive through your actions. Not sure how to do that, drop me an email. I’d be glad to offer a few suggestions.
As I have said before pozitood is not something that just happens. You have to make it happen which means that you have to believe. Pozitood is something you have to work at, like a job. Except there is no paycheck at the end of the week. The pay is in an inner confidence that manifests as the bright light of positive energy that helps you through every interaction and situation you encounter in life.
There will be times when your pozitood is tested. There are times when you’re gonna break and be predictable or negative….shit we’re human. It’s at those times when you need pozitood the most because it’s gonna be your safety net that you fall into when the negativity and shit seem overwhelming.
Last thoughts – It’s ok if every once in a while you walk into the produce section of the grocery store, place a bunch of grapes on your head and proceed to spend the next half hour shopping. Trust me it feels so damn good. Note: it goes over much better if at the end of shopping you actually buy the grapes.
Remember – Don’t ever take yourself tooooo serious.